Your baby is turning one. Just think! Twelve glorious months of coo-cooing and goo-gooing. What wonderful memories!
Think again about that year and you’ll remember sleepless nights; peeing and pooing and changing the diapers at 3 in the morning; food on the floor, screaming and crying jags that seem to have lasted an hour. (Maybe it was really two hours?)
Let us introduce you to another member of the family: The Overly Honest Baby Book: Uncensored Memories from Baby’s First Year (Seal Press, $15). Dawn Dais’ slim hardbound volume is not only useful . . . it’s a perfect release for all the unwonderful baby memories. A few samples:
The Year You Were Born (Also Known as the Year Your Parents Stopped Being Fun
Blanks to fill in include . . .
♥ The ways our generation is ruining everything for your generation
♥ Pack of condoms $ (wasted money)
Your Conception (So Much Magic and Maybe Also a Little Intoxication)
♥ How much booze was involved
♥ The number of turkey basters involved in this most natural of human processes
♥ The various curse words Mommy uttered when she saw the positive symbol on her pregnancy test
Our fave is The Wide World of the Web (Mommy’s New Hobby: 2 a.m. Internet Searches)
♥ Can babies die from crying too much?
♥ Can parents die from ramming their own heads against a nursery wall?
♥ How much infant feces is too much infant feces in my mouth?
There are only places to paste in those perfect photos
♥ An ultrasound of your feet kicking Mommy’s bladder (your favorite way to pass the time)
♥The photo that crushed all our hopes that you would be the next Gerber baby
The illustrations by Jill Howarth add a delicious (and funny!) touch.
Ready for another kid?